A DINNER PARTY AT CHRISTMAS TIME

WAS MORE LIKE A BLIND DATE

WARNING

This blog does contain adult and gay material. If you are under your country's legal age (18 or 21), do not scroll down and leave this page now. Thanks

By Richard de Orizaba

Oftentimes I can’t go to all the dinners I get invited to because of scheduling problems or because I already have an invitation somewhere else. One of the things I hate the most are blind dates and next to that is to be “paired off” like an arranged situation so that I meet someone my host thinks I would hit it off with. I have never had one yet that I was either attracted to or that worked out as a bed partner. Most of them I am not even attracted to in the very least.

But this night was going to be different…I would have to eat my words and the food my host had prepared. Mind, you what he made was not just weird but a very bad choice for an entrée…I will explain why later. This dinner party took place just the day before Christmas.

If you are invited to a dinner party at the house of a gay guy (or more likely, the house of two gay guys) it is crucial not to arrive empty-handed. Always ask what you can bring. If you are told to bring something specific, bring it. If you are not told to bring something specific, bring wine. If you are told not to bring anything, bring wine. You will never be told not to bring wine.

While the dinner party is a wonderful environment for conversation, that is almost never the main reason for a gay guy dinner party. Gay guys generally throw dinner parties for one of two reasons: to show off some fabulous aspect of their lives, or to find a boyfriend for a single friend, and sometimes both.

My lawyer Preston gives three or four dinner parties every year. Those are parties that I can’t miss because of the great bond that exists between Preston and me. It is an unwritten law that neither one of us would turn down an invitation from each other. Mind you, they are not that frequent and when he does have some kind of event I have to accept.

I arrived at the time he specified and there was only one other person there. It was a houseguest from Ohio who had gone to school with Preston. His name was Brad and we began talking but I never got to ask him which school he and Preston attended together. They were not the same age, Preston being a good ten years older so I am assuming it was not elementary school.

Our conversation got was interrupted as we had some appetizers and a cocktail and I was about to ask him how he and Preston met but the doorbell rang and I was the closest to the door so I went to answer it. Two more showed up and they brought wine as did I. Delightful and attractive these new arrivals, I thought…then I started to think about Brad…he too was very attractive.

Within minutes five more people arrived…all single men and gorgeous. I started to suspect that an orgy was in the making but when I saw the table set on my way to open the front door as I peeked into the dining room I seriously questioned that thought. Then also, there was a housekeeper that Preston employs and she is an older Mexican lady and I am sure she is not going to participate in an orgy.

The last three to arrive was a gay couple and one more beautiful single guy. We all gathered in Preston’s lanai and had appetizers and cocktails. The conversation was lively and the guys were all cruising each other…I was looking at a couple of them with lust…of course…how could I not…they were drop-dead gorgeous.

At the outset, I kind of felt out of place and under-dressed. Preston didn’t mention it was a formal dinner party. As I looked around, everyone except me was dressed in a suit and tie. But leave it up to me…well; actually I can get away with shit like that because everyone thinks I am somewhat eccentric.

I was taught a thing or two in culinary school. One of them was how to set a proper table. Of course, Preston is not just “polished” but has an old money pedigree which I am sure included table manners and dinner etiquette. When we went into the dining room I noticed right away all the little details.

1. The thing they forgot to mention about a formal place setting (they have it wrong!) is that a formal place setting NEVER properly includes a bread and butter plate or a butter spreader. Yup. It sounds really strange, but tradition dictates that you only get a b&b plate for informal occasions. If it's black tie for guests and the table, then you put your bread on the tablecloth. So I guess that Preston could get away with it because this was not a black tie affair.

2. For formal occasions, the dinner napkin is always folded and placed down the center of the dinner plate. For informal meals you're free to be as creative with napkin folding as you like. Fan folds. origami folds, blossom folds in the water goblet. Whatever appeals to you.

3. Both wine glasses and silverware should be placed in their order of use, with the exception of the salad fork. Forks always go to the left of the dinner plate, and when the smaller salad fork is to the left of the larger dinner fork, that indicates it is to be used for the starter course. When it is between the dinner fork and the dinner plate that indicates it is a salad fork even though many Americans, unlike Europeans, serve salad before the main course.

4. If a desert spoon and fork are part of the place cover, they should go above the plate.

5. A teaspoon is not normally part of a place cover, except at family meals when coffee or tea will be served. For formal and informal non-family occasions they are brought in with the coffee/tea service. Preston had the teaspoons set out.

6. Dinner knife goes immediately to the right of the dinner plate, sharp edge toward the plate. I know. It looks more symmetrical and better balanced aesthetically with the sharp edge away from the plate, but unbreakable tradition says you don't want to do that. Knife edge toward the plate is an unspoken pledge by the host to his guests that no knives will be drawn or blood let during the meal. It's a tradition worth keeping.

7. Glasses: In the U.S., the water goblet is placed above the dinner knife, and wine glasses go to the right of it in order of use. There's a general rule of thumb in this country that you never place more than three of anything on the table at one time, including forks, spoons, and wine goblets. If you’re serving both a white and red wine with dinner, that makes three glasses counting the water goblet. However, it is acceptable to put the champagne glass above and between the water goblet and red wine goblet where it will be in easy reach after previous courses are cleared.

8. China service. It's always smart to buy an "open stock" pattern, which means the company doesn’t plan on discontinuing it any time soon. Open stock also means you can buy just one saucer or plate if one gets broken. Preston had some lovely Spode that was vintage and I am sure not of open stock.

9. Place cards are hand lettered and placed on top of the napkin or in a place card holder above the dinner plate. Preston didn’t have name cards as those are mainly for weddings…at the time we went to sit down, Preston told each one of us where we should sit…Preston being at the head of the table and I got to sit at the other end…which shows a lot of deference and honor.

10. Salts and Peppers. For formal and formally informal meals, small salt and pepper shakers or cellars may be placed individually above each place setting, but in the interest of less cluttered tabletops, it's more usual to set a pair to be shared by each two diners.

11. And finally, a word about centerpieces and candles. There is nothing more annoying than getting up from the table after a nice conversation with the person seated across from you and not having a clue as to what he looks like! Keep centerpieces low enough that guests can see each other clearly, and the same for candles. Five arm candelabras may be lovely, but if they prevent people from seeing each other comfortably, use another candle holder.

Now comes the unpleasant part. After a lovely soup and a salad, Preston served a palate cleansing orange ice…homemade! Then after that came a seafood dish: Vol au vents of scallops with a lovely white sauce. So far so good; but we got to the main course and this is where it all went to hell. It seems that Preston assumed that everyone had great catholicity of taste. The main course consisted of brain fritters…yup, you read correctly…fucking brain fritters.

Now, I am adventurous and daring but when it comes to food I only have one rule: I do not eat viscera or entrails nor do I eat brains. Mind you, I was very polite and took the first bite out of it and my fears were confirmed…it is absolutely hideous…it has to do more with the texture than with the taste. I think everyone just “picked” at the food.

The meal was graced with a lovely dessert and then we went into the library where we had cognac and cigars. Everyone had paired off by then and it was clear that me and Brad were left to pair off as if by design. Preston had one guy who was scrumptious linger and they went off upstairs together; leaving Brad and me alone. Brad went into the guest bedroom adjacent to the library and changed clothes. When he came back he looked even better because now I could see a nice body accentuated by the tight fitting shirt.

Brad had been hand feeding me strawberries in a most sensual way earlier that night. I got the message.

About this time the maid came in to say she was leaving…she had cleaned up the dining room and the kitchen and was done with her work. I then said to Brad that I too had to get going and that is when he put the moves on me. He walked up to me, looked into my eyes and with his hand lovingly caressed my face and said: “Richard, why don’t you stay with me a little while?”

One thing led to another and we went into the guest bedroom where he was staying and undressed. We were kissing passionately at first. I was not very confident about my breath after cognac and cigars but Brad didn’t seem to mind.

Then I grabbed his cock and I said: “I sure would like to have this up my ass” and his answer was as he reached for my cock: “And I yours…we’re just gonna have to flip-flop”

Brad was a light skinned black, you know the type…with that delicious color that drives you crazy. His body was very well developed and the icing on the cake was his cock…uncut and large; it was at least a nine inch one and thick. The armpits too were to die for with thick nappy hair and the macho scent I like so much.

I went down on him immediately and he turned so that he also started to suck me. This 69 lasted a while because he was really good at sucking cock and I couldn’t get enough of his balls and the musky scent. As I explored the underside of his nuts he was now above me and brought his ass right over my mouth…Absolutely delicious! When I had rimmed him a while…and he had not taken his mouth out of my cock then he let go of my dick and sat up where I was now rimming him…he sat on my face!

He then crawled a little and sat on my cock…it went in without difficulty after the rim job I had given him and he was expressing his pleasure: “oh Richard, you have the biggest cock…it is the biggest I have ever been fucked with…oh, oh, shit, it hurts, ah, ah, yeah, ah, ah, it hurts so good, ah, ah, fuck me Richard, I want you to cum…yeah, that’s it, fuck me” I was underneath but he remained squatted over me while I moved at a hundred miles an hour into that pucker. Brad couldn’t hold it back and he started to shoot his load without even touching himself. “oh, oh, shit Richard, I’m cumming, ah, ah, ah”

All that cum landed over my belly and chest and I scooped it up with my hand and licked it…I offered him some and I just kept fucking him. Then he said: “Please Richard, when you are ready to cum, take it out of my ass and give it to me to eat it” And so I did, just listening to him say that brought me to the edge…I pulled out and he went down on me to capture all my ejaculation.

I spent the night with Brad in the guest bedroom and we must have fucked at least three more times; one of which he played top.

SOURCE: http://chowhound.chow.com/topics/480818